Thursday, January 7, 2010

"She even wear her hair down her back like mine"





Don't get it twisted I love my baby to bits and pieces. My E.B. (Estranged Boyfriend) as I affectionately call him loves me too (I guess), but there's one thing we don't agree on. My love of wigs and weaves and no matter how hard I try to go without them for the sake of a happy home I can't. I just can't. I love me and I think I'm by far one of the coolest chicks on the planet, but I'm not as pretty without long hair. Yeah. That's a fucked up thing to say, but it's true. It's my truth.

"You make sure your hair looks pretty. Always have presentable hair. It's one thing to be fat, another to be black, but NEVER be fat, black, and bald-headed."

Those words came from the mouth of my mom when I was five. I will remember them for the rest of my life. I'm already a chubster. Even when I lose weight I will be happy at 175-180, and at my height (5'4") that will Still make me a chubster so fat is basically my life. I'm a dark ass girl. I'm ok with that. Ain't a bleaching cream in the world gonna change it. Nor do I want to change it. I'm a dark chocolate princess. A plus-size barbie. I'm a diva. A Bad Bitch, but not so much when I look like this.

or

I have NOTHING in common with the above two girls. They look like me, but yet just an uglier version of myself.

Call it a warped sense of self-esteem if you want, but it's all apart of a look. And I know exactly what look works for me. I do what I must to make myself feel beautiful. Maybe he feels I am beautiful without it, but I have learned over the years you can't change things about you for someone else's happiness. Even though it's nice to have other's love you. I like the love I have for myself a hell of a lot more. I like to get ready for work, look in the mirror, and know that when I get on the bus all the perverted men will be looking at me, because I'm THAT damn well put together! And I don't feel that way when it comes to the hair that grows out of my head. Sorry!

This girl is me....synthetic half-wig happiness and all
So do what makes you happy...Wayne said, "She even wear her hair down her back like mine". But he didn't say shyt about how she got it! LOL

8 comments:

  1. Oh my goodness girl, I can totally relate, especially dating someone who is white. Everytime I take my hair down, he is always like you should just wear it natural. He doesn't understand my love for my weave. I just like being able to wake up and shake my long flowing yaki and be happy. I have no shame on my weave game. Its also funny how I can go to the shop with my hair wrapped up in a scarf feeling and looking like crap, to leave with my new flowing locks and feel better than beyonce...

    ReplyDelete
  2. lol. i am a weave fiend. so i feel ya. :)

    ReplyDelete
  3. That's right girl work your weave... You bought..it's your hair. That's what I tell em! hmph

    ReplyDelete
  4. I'm 44, have been married over 20 years, and have a husband who hates curly hair on me. It's too poofy. So the last 15 years I have looked like shit (may I say that here?) felt that way too because I hated my hair.

    So for Christmas I bought myself a new Caruso steam set with tons of rollers and now I sport my poofy, curly hair and feel a million times better.

    Never let a man dictate. (Mine didn't dictate, but I got tired of hearing you're too poofy so I quit curling.)

    You wear your weave and love it every minute, and I'll wear my poofy curls and we'll both be happy!

    ReplyDelete
  5. sigh yeah I feel you. I grew up being told by boarding school friends "you'll be ugly if you cut your hair" so I never did, always afraid. then in college i said fck it!!!!!! and cut y hair LOW, like 2 cm's, my family & friends freaked out, but every few years, I would cut my hair after it grew out, and then it became crazy some people prefer me with short hair.

    i think you look gorgeous with any length, but do whatever makes u feel great even if its a 20inch weave *hugs*

    ReplyDelete
  6. My hair is natural, believe it or not. I wish I had a curly head of hair. I've ALWAYS wished for it. I said I was gonna weave it up if I couldn't have it naturally. I do wanna try weaves though. Hmm, I want long and silky some days and others i wanna do a curly mop top! lol HELP ME! cause i've not a clue as to where to start!

    ReplyDelete
  7. Weave is my best friend, but occasionally, I wear my hair out in a short style - whether it's an eve 'tambourine' bob, or a kelis style cut :)

    Loool when anywhen wants to tell me nonsense about my hair, I just tell them, that since I purchased it and it's on my head - it's MINE!

    Your E.B is gonna have to deal with your weave, but that doesn't mean that you shouldn't try new natural styles once in a while :)

    ReplyDelete
  8. I used to hateweaves..vowed Id never wear them bc their fake..but now? i love them. They are fake but when ppl have good weave in their hair it just makes them look and feel better! :)
    However I think people should be comfortable in their own skin/hair. I personally like the first pic of your short hair. i think you shoud try a glamorous short style and see if you still think its "ugly". If so, throw the weave back in..no risk! :)

    ReplyDelete

LinkWithin

Related Posts with Thumbnails