Tuesday, January 5, 2010

I got 99 Problems...: A Look at the sanctity of love and relationships

Disclaimer: I am NOT a relationship expert by any means. My own current "situation" is sooooo "effed up" I would be the last person to point out another person's "room to improve". What I do know is love, how it feels, and what I expect. And Honestly that's all I can discuss.

Who knows... maybe you've been under a rock and didn't know that "Mama Creole" aka Tina Knowles aka Beyonce mama has filed for divorce from husband of 29 years Mr. Matthew Knowles in late November. Matthew is currently fighting a paternity suit from a Miss Alexsandra Wright who claims to be the mother of his latest project, a child. There have been rumors milling around about Mr. Knowles for years. From him attempting to ruin the careers of others (i.e LaTavia and LeToya), a possible yayo addiction and a giving penis (i.e he likes to GIVE it to Everybody). Well from the looks of it it has all finally caught up with him. I'm not posting it to begin my celeb-parents gossip dish, but to say this. Is there respect or sanctity in love and marriage anymore?

It seems that men and women are not content coming home to the same person each day, and making love to the same person each night. People have taken on this "variety is the spice of life" mentality. Most of the time they forget to let their partners in on this new-age train of thought. Maybe I'm just a good-girl gone bad. Raised in a Wisconsin church with what appeared to be good, stable, old school marriages around me. People who stuck it out over many a rough spot, but made it out of the turmoil together just as smooth as silk. Maybe I saw too much of that and expect the same in my life. Maybe I want too much. Or is it that people currently don't want enough from their relationships?

I refuse to go into details about how much this man has screwed up

I decided to send out a random text/facebook/twitter question today: Is there ever a time cheating is acceptable? The answers were pretty much what I expected. The ladies ranged from it's okay if it's a vengeful payback cheat, no, no and hell no! The gentlemen (and I use that term loosely for some) had more to say. I got a flat out no, a yes if she's not giving me oral and a.........
Yes. If it's a payback. Or the other person is a 10. Or if you've cheated w/ this person before. Or if you're out of state. Or if you're drunk. Or if you don't remember.--my manwhore bud, David

So in a nutshell men have a tendency to believe that their are legitimate reasons to cheat. So where does that leave a relationship? If you can't promise you body to one person, then why promise your heart? Why forge ahead into a long relationship or marriage that you aren't ready to be apart of?

explain to me how did a married man go from.......this

to this...without a slight thought of divorce until AFTER he was caught! smh

Hmmm Go figure! Does the world find sanctity in love anymore? Why couldn't Mr. Knowles say, "I have been with this woman for over twenty-nine years, I have 2 daughters one that I have famously pimped all over the damn planet (oops forgive me lol) and she deserves more respect than this". People forget that the main attribute of love is respect if you can't respect a person, and their wishes, you both should leave before it gets messy. Love is a very touchy emotion. When it's good it's GOOD and when it's bad please believe it's BAD. Hurt feeling lead to bruised bodies...in some cases. So think about it. Exactly who and what do you hold dear to you? And be woman or man enough to let everything else........go.


  1. Damn, that's deep but very true. I love reading your blogs!! They are great!!!

  2. .....I AGREE...people dont know what real Loyalty is. A trait that is LOST

  3. You made me smile and laugh with some of the responses you related to whether or when it's okay to cheat. The first step, it would seem to me, is for each person to be honest with themselves, and then to be honest with the person they're having a relationship with. It would be good for people thinking about having a relationship to let each other know what they expect and what the consequences might be if the other one cheats. Do you think people should have some kind of agreement in advance about what kind of consequences there could be for those who don't have an absolute "cheat once and it's over forever" mindset? I think loyalty is imperative once you've gotten married (unless your a swinger in an "open" marriage - whatever that is). Interesting blog! I'll be following it.



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