Things that are NOT welcome in 2011
(aka leave dat shyt at the door on 12/31/2010 at 11:59 P.M)
1. Stop losing yourself in relationships.
Ain't nothing wrong with putting one hundred percent of yourself into your personal (friendships, romantic, and family) relationships, but when shit hits the fan (and it can AND will) you should not be standing mascara running, teary eyed, with a pill bottle in one hand and an empty bacardi bottle in the other. There is a reason these relationships started. And a reason they end. Rather than feel bad for yourself acknowledge how great you are and feel bad for the OTHER person. They may meet a lot of people before they die, but they will never EVER meet another princess. Another perfection. Another Valecia. If you really must feel a sense of loss. Quickly mourn the loss of someone in your life that wasn't fit to be there. R.I.P to the square that didn't fit your circle. You are no longer allowed to destroy yourself over a person when their are so many people who have yet to partake of the joy of knowing you.
2. Stop feeling bad for saying NO.
You got that angry black girl facade down pat, but the fact of the matter is you let too much go to heart. If you've given all you can give and decide to tell someone NO say it and keep it moving. Don't say no and give a muthafucka an explanation. Or say no and feel bad about it. How many times has someone told you no? You think they nappy headed asses lost sleep about it? Hmm....all signs point to NO!!!
3. Stop belittling yourself.
No. You don't call yourself ugly. (Because that would be a flat out crime and sin) you do however wake up with just enough time to shower, jump your still half-wet un-lotioned body into work clothes, wash face, brush teeth, and bounce. Just barely making it to work. Standing at the bus stop with your foot half in your shoe. No eyeliner, no mascara, no lip gloss. Wig still needing some adjusting (but we'll take care of that at work in the bathroom). Looking like plain Jane's......older sister. Or worse. Her mama. After work coming home and changing into a holey pair of sweats, with matching holey tank top and let's not forget every black woman's favorite possesion......the infamous silk night scarf. And before you know it, you're headed to bed. Only to start the perpetual cycle of hot mess-ness for a new day. No one is going to love someone who doesn't love themselves. Stop acting like Hot mess when it's quite obvious you are Hot-ness.
4. Stop being the victim.
You know the motto. You don't have time to wait for things to happen to you...when you're making things happen.
I could have added a lot of shit. And not meant it. Like stop drinking. Stop eating red meat. The harsh reality is. The things in this list might be a hell of a lot harder to do than that. Whatever happens the tears and negativity that wrapped so much of this past year is being dropped. Thrown to the side to never be picked up again. A new adventure awaits. Blessings........